I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
