it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
