wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
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