Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Randomize
