16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Randomize
