I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
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