is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
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I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
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Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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