Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Just puked most of my soul out..
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
