Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
