Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
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