is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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