In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
