I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
He kissed a someone with a penis
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I'm determined to sit on that face.
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I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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