I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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