You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
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