I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize