The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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