I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
