I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
