therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
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