is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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