Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize
