Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Randomize
