to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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