i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
home. puking in laundry basket.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
