well you can't waste a boner
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Mom said you looked used
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
