Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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