i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize