How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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