Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
You were trust falling into bushes
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
