I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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