I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?