So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
this will be a night to untag.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
