This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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