____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
It's like God shit irony all over that family
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
