If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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