Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I lost the right to judge tonight
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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