There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Randomize
