I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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