All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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