i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
