i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
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