My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
