and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Randomize
