She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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