She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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