By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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