Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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