You smell like stripper and shame
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize