I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
