we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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